First, we must discuss the oversharing of inane details. Because I don't need or want to know what this person did at 6pm, and then at 7pm, and then at 8pm. We run through the MC's daily schedule over and over and over. This could have been 30 pages shorter if the author left out all this nonsense of daily activities.
My second issue would be the MC: Olivia. She is all bravado. She's told not to pick a fight with the all-powerful vampire, so she immediately picks a fight with the all-powerful vampire, backing it up with a sense of superiority she is in no way entitled to. She blames herself for something bad that happened - she thinks she pushed people to do things that put them in danger. While wallowing in this guilt, she then decides to push somebody else into doing something rash and dangerous in order to find out who caused the something dangerous that already got people killed. That makes no fucking sense! "Oh, I can't believe I did that. Let me do it again!" She is no warrior. And with the political setting this book has, that seemed like it would be alright. Until you actually read the story and you're like "This girl is such a wimp!" She runs away constantly.
"I have powers?" Run away!
"Somebody is targeting me via demon?" Run away!
"When I called for help, somebody actually showed up to help!" Run away!
"Is that a sexy guy?" Run away!
"Mom's been drinking." Run away!
"My boyfriend doesn't like my job." Run away!
"You know who my father is and you didn't tell me?!" Run away!
"I need to think about my next move." Run away!
My third issue - this was boring. The high points weren't very high and the low points didn't seem all that bad. Olivia wasn't a strong presence, the plot moved along at a pace that would make a snail appear to be a speed demon, the threats weren't very threatening, etc. It could have been so much more - all of it, everything could have been more. Not more of it, but... more exciting? I dunno. It was bland.
And finally, the editing. Holy Jesus, what happened here? There are tons of errors. Extra words, missing words, wrong words. I dunno about the placement of punctuation or anything like that, I didn't notice. But I noticed easily a dozen errors when it came to whole words. An extra "I" thrown in there, a missing "to". Very noticeable, much more so than punctuation or spacing errors.
Overall, I like the story. I like the characters. I'm interested to see where the story is headed. But I'm not impressed and it was a heavily skimmed read once I realized how much the author liked to dither on backstory and descriptions. Not sure I'd recommend it yet, I feel like I'll have a better idea of whether or not I'd recommend it later.